by Jean Nathalia
28 Dec – Feast of the Holy Family
The Holy Family
We celebrate that Holy Family of Nazareth which is the model for all who fear the Lord and walk in his ways.
- Sunday Missal
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Ecclesiasticus 3:3-7,14-17
The Lord honours the father in his children,
and upholds the rights of a mother over her sons.
Whoever respects his father is atoning for his sins,
he who honours his mother is like someone amassing a fortune.
Whoever respects his father will be happy with children of his own,
he shall be heard on the day when he prays.
Long life comes to him who honours his father,
he who sets his mother at ease is showing obedience to the Lord.
My son, support your father in his old age,
do not grieve him during his life.
Even if his mind should fail, show him sympathy,
do not despise him in your health and strength;
for kindness to a father shall not be forgotten
but will serve as reparation for your sins.
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Colossians 3:12-21
You are God’s chosen race, his saints; he loves you, and you should be clothed in sincere compassion, in kindness and humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with one another; forgive each other as soon as a quarrel begins. The Lord has forgiven you; now you must do the same. Over all these clothes, to keep them together and complete them, put on love. And may the peace of Christ reign in your hearts, because it is for this that you were called together as parts of one body. Always be thankful.
Let the message of Christ, in all its richness, find a home with you. Teach each other, and advise each other, in all wisdom. With gratitude in your hearts sing psalms and hymns and inspired songs to God; and never say or do anything except in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Wives, give way to your husbands, as you should in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and treat them with gentleness. Children, be obedient to your parents always, because that is what will please the Lord. Parents, never drive your children to resentment or you will make them feel frustrated.
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Luke 2:22-40
When the day came for them to be purified as laid down by the Law of Moses, the parents of Jesus took him up to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord, – observing what stands written in the Law of the Lord: Every first-born male must be consecrated to the Lord – and also to offer in sacrifice, in accordance with what is said in the Law of the Lord, a pair of turtledoves or two young pigeons.
Now in Jerusalem there was a man named Simeon. He was an upright and devout man; he looked forward to Israel’s comforting and the Holy Spirit rested on him. It had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not see death until he had set eyes on the Christ of the Lord. Prompted by the Spirit he came to the Temple and when the parents brought in the child Jesus to do for him what the Law required, he took him into his arms and blessed God; and he said:
‘Now, Master, you can let your servant go in peace,
just as you promised;
because my eyes have seen the salvation
which you have prepared for all the nations to see,
a light to enlighten the pagans
and the glory of your people Israel.’
As the child’s father and mother stood there wondering at the things that were being said about him, Simeon blessed them and said to Mary his mother, ‘You see this child: he is destined for the fall and for the rising of many in Israel, destined to be a sign that is rejected – and a sword will pierce your own soul too – so that the secret thoughts of many may be laid bare.’
There was a prophetess also, Anna the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was well on in years. Her days of girlhood over, she had been married for seven years before becoming a widow. She was now eighty-four years old and never left the Temple, serving God night and day with fasting and prayer. She came by just at that moment and began to praise God; and she spoke of the child to all who looked forward to the deliverance of Jerusalem.
When they had done everything the Law of the Lord required, they went back to Galilee, to their own town of Nazareth. Meanwhile the child grew to maturity, and he was filled with wisdom; and God’s favour was with him.
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Forgive each other as soon as a quarrel begins
Family is one of the most difficult topics to write about because of how private it is. It is easy for me to speak of my family to others when things are going well. I readily share the positive attributes of my family with others. However, when it comes to more challenging struggles, it is not easy for me to share this with others because I fear that others will judge my family members. Only I can think poorly of them, no one else is allowed to.
Such is the strong unexplainable bond that we have with our family members. A bond that goes into the core of our being, giving them the power to be the ones who can make us feel the deepest joys and the deepest sorrows. When things go wrong in my life, comforting words of encouragement from my family member will go deeper into my heart than any form of encouragement that I can find elsewhere. But when there is disharmony within my family, the pain cuts deep and takes me into a fury that no one else has the ability to take me to.
Somehow, family has such power to take us to heaven and to hell in a way that nothing else in the world can. It is scary – such power they have over us, particularly for those of us who have been and/or remain in abusive families (e.g., physical, sexual, emotional abuse). When our family hurts us, ongoing healing is necessary in order to nurse these deep-seated wounds.
Just as they have such power over us, you and I also have the power to take our family members to heaven and hell. Very often, I am sure we start off with the best of intentions, wanting to bless our family members. But a little impatience from them, a sign of being taken for granted, a careless comment, and we find our old wounds pressed on, leading to us condemning them either aloud or in our hearts. With our wounds so easily reopened, how will we ever succeed in taking our family to heaven?
Perhaps the answer really is the most simple: forgive first, before all else. Forgiveness is not saying that people can freely hurt and wrong me. Forgiveness is saying, “I choose our peace first”. If needed, I can and must dialogue about certain issues at a later time. But for now, I choose our peace.
If I want to build heaven in my families, I must build my muscle of forgiveness. It is not an option, it is a necessity for it is impossible to live with people without stepping on each other’s toes. I live in a real world where wrong will be done and hurts will happen. On my own, I will never be able to forgive for this muscle of mine is underdeveloped. I can only pray that God will give me the grace to build this muscle. The more I exercise it, the stronger my muscle will be. May God encourage me on this journey, showing me that all things are possible for those who believe in Him, and that heaven is the greatest reward for choosing to put on the cloak of love.
“Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got” (Author unknown).
(Today’s OXYGEN by Jean Nathalia)
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Prayer: Jesus, encourage me to be a woman who builds heaven in my families. Encourage me to never stop building the muscle of forgiveness.
Thanksgiving: We give thanks to family members who constantly bring heaven to us by looking beyond our bad behaviours and choosing to live in peace with us. We give thanks for those who have helped us to build heaven within our families.
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