Because of Me

By Jack Chui

I'm currently half way through a short holiday to Malaysia primarily to witness my close second cousin get married. I didn't really need a holiday as the last one wasn't too far away but I make my best attempt to be at my cousins weddings while I have the time and flexibility to do so. This is the first time I'm travelling alone to Malaysia and the furthest I've travelled to for a wedding. And its not a first cousin whom by natural law I'm closer to but for my dear second cousin.

However, this post is not going to be about how I would go through so much 'trouble' for seemingly 'less significant' people.

Rather, one of the highlights of the short trip was being able to have lunch with my grandparents. Before the trip I wasn't planning on seeing my grandparents as disrespectful as that sounds mainly because its hard for us to communicate. I can only speak English (there's apparently a special place in hell for Chinese people like me who can't speak Chinese... =P) and they can only speak Chinese. My grandfathers English is actually OK, but only good for a very shallow short conversation. Seeing them at the wedding would be good enough I thought.

My good uncle who picked me up from the airport had more honourable plans for me though and actually arranged a lunch for me and my grandparents. I wasn't too apprehensive about the event and my uncle assured me that he would help translate if needed. The lunch went well and my grandparents were happy to just see me. I was too happy to see them. The conversation wasn't too bad as my grandfathers younger brother also came so they had some more interesting people to talk once I ran out of things to say.

What touches me most though wasn't what happened over lunch, but more that they wanted to come to lunch. My uncle who isn't even their son, had been trying many times to bring my grandparents out for lunch being the very openly hospitable family man that he is but most times they would say no. My grandmother has great difficulty traveling anything but the shortest of distances and so the usual answer to event outside their farm house is no. But this time they said yes. It may have been because I had just travelled a long way just to see them and they felt bad. We don't know each other that well to my knowledge because its hard to talk to them. What we know each other is mostly what my parents tell them/me of each other.

But I think its because I'm their grandson. There's not really any other good reason why they would agree to a lunch if it weren't for that reason. I did not have to do anything - even talk to them over the several times in my life that I've happened to meet them. It was not really learnt at all. I did not really deserve such an honour either given that I hardly tried learning Chinese to be able to at least say something to them. It reminds me of the love God has for me - that I did not have to do all things good or few things bad to gain His love. Because I'm His adopted son, I am already loved. I am loved for who I am, not for what I do.

I sometimes struggle to see this love in my life - keeping myself busy with ministry to make sure I 'justify' my existence. I thank God for reminding me of His love for me through my grandparents. Please pray for me that I can hold onto this truth more in my life.